Isn’t it funny how often the things we worry most about are often those that are most out of our control? And on a day as important as your wedding day when emotions are running high and when you can least afford to wear worry on your face, your worry meter will likely be in the red zone! After all, you are only throwing the biggest, most important celebration of your life, right?! No pressure! But since this is a day that you will want to look back on and break out in a smile rather than in a cold sweat, it is worth considering a couple of things that commonly cause great stress to a bride (yes, the groom rarely cares about these things) on the wedding day.
Preparing yourself mentally and altering your thinking just a little can make a big difference in how you approach and enjoy this special day.
The Weather: No ladies, you cannot special order the weather as you can your flowers and cake, no matter how much you are willing to pay! And how can you possibly know in November when you set the June wedding date, that there will be a freak rainstorm that day? Weather is simply one of those things that you will have to contend with, whatever Mother Nature blesses or curses you with that day. Be prepared for anything and have a back-up plan in mind. And if you have to go with plan B, don’t do it begrudgingly, EMBRACE IT! Put on rain boots at the reception and run through the rain, take your shoes off in the 100 degree heat…these experiences can make for a lot of laughs and some terrific spontaneous pictures!
Attendants: The wedding day has arrived and you have done all that you can to prepare. One of the groomsmen stumble in just before the procession, 5 o’ clock shadow, tussled hair and a little pasty (true story!). Your maid of honor has decided that her new black polish will look fabulous with her petal pink dress (ignoring the special color you have already picked out and delivered!). You have a vision and have communicated it to your attendants but in the end people will do what they will do. There are things just not worth addressing in those final moments. You have to pick your battles and if you find one worth picking, save it for after the wedding. Dealing with in the hours before you walk down the aisle may leave you without any attendants at all!
Little Attendants: Trust me, letting little Mary lay on her back and suck her thumb during the ceremony is much less distracting that watching mom hiss and whisper to her from the sidelines! Tell mom that she off duty that day unless Mary refuses to walk down the aisle entirely, or is wetting herself on the stage (in which case she’s to swiftly snatch her up and make a quick getaway!) Otherwise, just let her do what she will. It will likely end up being a sweet memory!
Behind the Scenes: The caterers have put Alfredo on the penne and marinara on the Fusilli when it was supposed to be the other way around! The white runner has not been put down yet…that should have been the first order of business! Take a deep breath girls…the people behind the scenes know what they are doing even if they do it differently than you would. When you arrive at the wedding site early, you run the risk of seeing things you should be spared seeing! This point is compliments of facility coordinator, for St. Vincent’s School for Boys Jaqui Devine. Seeing the set-up in process can cause the bride significant stress, so Jaqui recommends arriving at the venue as close to the ceremony as possible and staying away from the center of activity. Keep in mind that whatever state the venue is in at that moment, it will be ready when the guests begin arriving. So if you arrive early for a special photo session, let what is going on behind the scenes fade into the background as you enjoy the process of memorializing your special day. Remember brides, if you don’t enjoy yourself, no one will. This is your day, you set the tone.
So couples, plan well, expect the best and in the end, roll with the punches. If you remember that you live in the real world and have real world expectations, you will have an amazing day! And who knows, you may end up with a few stories to tell!